Posts Tagged ‘reading’

My Friend “Piglet”

May 2, 2011

Today, I am paying tribute to my funny friend, Piglet.  Piglet recently left for “kitty heaven.”  While there is nothing funny about losing a loved one, you can look back and remember the humorous times.

Piglet lived in a trailer, in a trailer park, on the Oregon coast. Piglet loved to sit in the window, facing the ocean, next to a warm computer.  Piglet would sit there for HOURS “people watching.”  Piglet also liked to escape because he loved the “thrill of the chase.”  That would be, everyone chasing HIM.  He would always return, when HE felt like it.  It was not like Piglet would go very far.  Afterall, he lived right across the street from a huge body of water, the Pacific Ocean.  But Piglet was always looking for opportunity.  When he did escape, he always came next door for a visit.  Piglet liked “the woman” as she would always go up to his window and talk to the “Piggy.”  Once, “the woman” left her front door ajar, and the escaped “Piggy” came over, snuck in undetected, and made his way back to the bedroom.  Once back there, he let out a LOUD hello.  The scream he got in response sent him back out the door at about 85 miles per hour.   He then went under her place and stayed out of reach for over an hour, causing everyone to stand around waiting for him to come out.  Luckily, it was a nice day.  Maybe Piglet did not get enough “mad dashes” in his life, or did not get as much exercise living in a smaller space.   Regardless, diabetes can be very mean to a cat.

Well, Piglet, my friend, I hope wherever you are, you have a cozy window seat with the sun smiling on you, and a beautiful view.  Save ME a spot!………more later………T.W.

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A Cat Can’t Change It’s Spots…

November 28, 2010

I got scolded this evening for leaving a trail of kitty litter across the laundry room floor by “the woman.”  I was asked why I can’t “Shake-Off” as I exit the cat box.  For real.  Shake-off?  I had an idea of another word (with less letters) that could go with “off.”  I would never say it, of course, just think it.  So “she” is tired of sweeping up after me.  You would think I left the toilet seat up or something.  Actually, I would think that would be worse?  I have “exited” my box the same way for over 5 years.  Why should I change my customary method of operation?  It works for me.  I am getting older and can not remember new changes to old routines!  Moral of this story:  You cannot teach an old cat new tricks…………………more later….. T.W.

That Annual Holiday Letter…

November 28, 2010

Well, it has been awhile!  I have just been uninspired the last few months.  A case of the “doldrums.”   Luckily, I have snapped out of it just in time for the hustle and bustle of the “season of brotherly love.”  (I am keeping out religious overtones–you will understand this statement when you read on.)  So a couple of days after Thanksgiving, I am thinking time to at least say something.  Scanning the newspaper for inspiration, I saw an article on how to write those annual ‘form’ letters some of you send out either with your Christmas card, or cheaper yet, alone or via e-mail.   “The Oregonian”  article said that your letter should be a treat.  Seriously, for REAL? (heh, heh, heh)  Here is what is suggested your letter should contain:  1) The Date (duh);   2) Be Genuine and Stay Upbeat (I guess saying “Times are Tough, Times are Hard, Here’s Your F-ing Christmas Card” is out?);   3) Keep Detail to a Minimum (I agree with that.   I know you are a great  grandmother  BUT do I need to hear about it even more at Christmas? Most definitely NOT. THANK YOU.  I do not talk about my fleas.  I do not need to hear that “Johnny” is getting “Matchbox: Stinky the Garbage Truck” for Christmas and that you stood in line 2 hours at Wal-Mart to get it for $49.  My fleas are way more interesting, purrsonally;   4) Use Humor and Self Deprecation.  (That’s hilarious.  While some of  “the woman’s”  friends are funny, they would never think of putting themselve’s down.  Are ya kidding me?);   5) Use a Conversational Tone.  (This blog is a good example of that, don’t you think?);   6) Hit Highlights Without Bragging. (For example, “I like vodka with cranberry juice but have discovered that if I drink too much, I can projectile vomit from 8-feet.  That is doorway to toilet without a miss.”  That is an example of what NOT to say;    7) Keep Out the Religious Overtones. (Probably should not have followed the “vomit” topic with this one, but I am going in order.  I am thankful for my God, but i do not preach this.  I leave folks up to their own beliefs and their own relationship with what they deem as their higher power.  I don’t even know what I don’t even know so why would I expound on telling anyone else what they should be doing;   8) Add a Personal Note, an Excellent Way to Close your Letter. 

Here is my Purrsonal Note:

May this season find you well.  May this season find you happy.  Try to find one thing to like about, and give compliment to, someone else.  Do at least one nice thing this next year to make a difference in someone else’s life.  And lastly, because I, myself, am a mischief-maker, if you can not be good, at least be VERY good at being bad!  Happy Holidays………..T.W.

Back From Hiatus….

January 29, 2010

From November 30, 2009, to January 29, 2010, I had to take a leave of absence from my Blog due to “The Woman’s” health, amongst other, issues.  She is, afterall, my (unpaid) assistant.  I never stopped writing during this time, so you may be now reading  my “holiday” blogs in  January….

It’s Always Something…

November 21, 2009

This evening, I was sitting at the kitchen table (on a chair at the table, just like regular folk) waiting for my nightly “acknowledgement.”  I politely engage in conversation till I am rightfully acknowledged.  By the way,  I take my “acknowledgement” and leave the table, as I am not allowed to eat on the table.  Is that not ridiculous?  “The woman” eats at the table.  Silly.  Isn’t  “what’s good for the goose, good for the gander” so-to-speak?  Oh well.  So while I am waiting, I overhear some conversation going on.  I hear the words “high maintenance” and my name in the same sentence.  I thought, “great.”  What did I do now?  Yes, I stole her gold-colored cat hat a few times, but I put it where she could find it.  There was the famous “chocolate-chip-cookie-incident,”  but haven’t we left that behind?  I did “the woman” a favor on that one.  Saved her a few calories and all.  I only shredded one of her shoe laces on her new running shoes.  The other shoe lace was fine.   Besides, she could still tie the shoes.  What’s the problem?  I, admittedly, have a shoe fetish.  I do not venture out much, shoes tell a story.   I can sniff where they have been.  It’s a “cozy” feeling.  Gees, if it’s not one thing, it’s something else.  It’s always something……..more later……..T.W.

My Christmas Wish List…..

November 21, 2009

Since they have already begun with the Christmas music on the radio, and it is 6 days before Thanksgiving if I am counting right, I guess I am not too early in saying this.  This morning I am eating my “gently warmed” cat food (exactly 8 seconds in the microwave, no more, no less) with the homemade gravy “the woman here” makes for us, when I see a face pressed against the sliding glass door watching me eat my breakfast.  It’s “Priss.”  I have mentioned her previously.  Priss lives next door and for whatever reason, she likes it over in MY backyard better than her own.  (Not really a problem, coz the only time I go outside is in an enclosed pet stroller in the summer weather.)  Poor Priss.  She looks pretty well fed and taken care of, all things considered.  But it got me thinking.   All my homeless brothers and sisters spending Christmas at the shelters, or on the streets.  And it’s getting cold out.   So here is “My Christmas Wish List.”   You may be able to help me with it:   1)  If your pet is not spayed or neutered, please do EVERYBODY a favor and do it NOW.  The problem of stray animals, especially cats, starts here;   2)  Adopt a pet for Christmas.  And instead of buying all the “stuff” you humans buy that ends up used, discarded, donated, and/or landfilled, save that money aside for the pet’s needs for the next year.  Such as food, litter, vet bills, a warm pet bed, a toy;   3)  If you can’t see your way to doing either of those suggestions, take a bag of cat or dog food to your nearby shelter or go in and hand them $10.  OR mail it.  Their address is in the phone book.  So easy.  And do it anonymously, if possible.  YOU will feel better for it………more later……..T.W.

A Tail of Obsession…..

November 21, 2009

I am fascinated with the color gold.  Anything of that color I seem to gravitate to.  It is an “obsession” for me but a “pet peeve” to “the woman.”  For example, “the woman” bought a knitted cat hat.  It has flaps that cover her ears, a knitted tail in the back, ears on top, and a sweet button nose on the cat face (top of the head).  She pulls it on tightly over all her long hair, and I swear it is to tease me.  It is a bright gold color.  So the past week and a half, we are playing hide-and-seek with the hat.  She puts it somewhere, I find it.  She comes home, it’s on the floor in the middle of the kitchen, or the living room, or wherever.   (I make sure it’s where she can’t miss it.) Yesterday, I worked all afternoon (or so it is said) trying to get the hat out of the top of her closet.   I did not quite accomplish my goal, but it was not for lack of trying.   I was a bit unsuccessful, hanging up or putting back things that came out of the closet during my “project.”  Tuesday, I figured out it was in her laptop bag and I liberated it, as well as other things, from there.  Monday, it was hanging on the coat rack.  That was a piece of cake.  The coat rack had to go DOWN.  I never see where the hat gets put, but it’s color is hard for me to miss.  This morning she gave me the hat.  She says, “have it, you want it so bad!”  I don’t want the hat, as C-U-T-E as it is.  It doesn’t fit me anyway.  I want her to hide it so I can show my prowess at hunting.   It’s about the game!  Gees, sometimes people can be so dumb………more later…..T.W.

You Talk Too Much…

November 18, 2009

Conversations are interesting things, if you can manage to not get bored by someone else’s topics.   Have you ever been jabbering along to someone, and they are listening quietly, and then they look at you and say, “wow, you’ve got a lot to say” ?   Always makes me wonder.  Were they really listening or just waiting for the opportunity to get in there that you talk too much?  Maybe you were boring them.  (Of course, this is not from a “purrsonal” standpoint.)  There’s a great book out titled “Tongue Fu!,” by author Sam Horn.  I read it in the attempt to be a better listener myself (and even a better conversationalist).  I learned 3 things:   1) If someone is incessantly talking along, push the “paws” (pause) button by saying their name.  That politely interrupts their train of thought.  (While they are trying to find their train, change the subject.),  2) At the end of their diatribe, quickly summarize what they said.   They assume you’ve been listening, thus closing the subject that was driving you crazy with boredom.,  and 3) When all else fails, when they “paws” for air, jump in with, “I wish I had more time, but I need to use the litter box.”   Then make a run for it……..more later…….T.W.

Knowing When to Give it Up….

November 17, 2009

Today “the woman here” sold her espresso machine on “craig’s list.”  Another fun thing gone.   Over.  I used to sit in the kitchen, hiding my glee with a purrfectly straight face, and watch her try to make a cup of espresso.    She would measure and re-measure the coffee beans.  Then she would put them in her electric coffee grinder till they were ground to just the purrfect consistency.  Noisy, but smelled good.  Then she would measure the amount of coffee she would need for the espresso machine.  Then she would  measure the water and pour it in.  The machine would brew the espresso just fine.  Purrfect, in fact.  Then she would measure the milk and pour it in to the stainless steel frothing cup.  She would hold the cup under the frother and then the milk would literally spray ALL over the kitchen.  Every time!  I mean EVERY TIME she would use the machine.  It was hilarious.  It frightened the poor “Kitty Katy,” but not me.  I ran around as fast as I could licking up the milk, and trying to beat the towel quickly coming around behind me.  It was a hoot!  The only thing that was frothing was her mouth.  And there was a lot frothing out of that,  I’ll tell you.   I would hear most of the alphabet being used one way or another.  If it wouldn’t have been so hilarious, I almost would have felt bad for her.  After her mouth was done frothing, and the milk all wiped up (by either myself or the towel), the machine would go back in the cupboard for awhile.  But about a month later, here it would come again.  I had to admire her tenacity.  She still kept trying to “lick” the problem she had with that machine.  I don’t know what made her throw in the proverbial “towel” this time.  But she got $45.00 for  the machine.  She paid $85.00 for it when she bought it new several years ago.  That’s been “cheap” entertainment in this day and age.  Where else are you going to get several years worth of laughs for $40.  That’s a bargain any day……….more later…….T.W.